Structuring Chaotic Minds

Leadership For Longevity: How to Lead for the Long Haul and Avoid Burnout

• Melissa Franklin • Season 3 • Episode 8

Share episode

Send us a text

Discover the secrets to sustainable leadership and prevent burnout with insights from our incredible panel of experts. Join Lee Agbohlah, Carlos DeLeon, and Maira Carrier as they share their personal stories and strategies for maintaining resilience and impact in today's fast-paced world. Learn how personal inspirations and community needs fuel their mission-driven work and how embracing both challenges and successes can lead to personal growth. Lee Agbola's transition from in-person coaching to online platforms highlights how you can scale your work while staying true to your unique strengths and mission.

Uncover the power of personal routines and mindfulness in maintaining balance as a leader. Our guests delve into meditation as a tool for self-awareness and decision-making, offering practical advice on incorporating fitness and self-care into daily life. They emphasize the importance of leveraging support systems, revealing the critical role of family, friends, and colleagues in sustaining momentum. The discussion touches on overcoming the fear of asking for help and the art of delegation, particularly in mission-driven work, to avoid burnout and stay aligned with your purpose.

Explore the transformative power of empowerment through personal growth and impactful leadership. Through poignant stories, we highlight how showing people their limitless potential can inspire them to overcome adversity. Learn about the emotional aspects of coaching that go beyond business improvements, focusing on personal transformation and the ripple effect of positive influence. Our conversation also addresses the challenges of balancing multiple roles, transitioning to entrepreneurship, and the importance of viewing experiences as learning opportunities. Hear valuable advice on preventing burnout, prioritizing joy, and staying true to your mission for a fulfilling leadership journey.


Join the "Structuring Chaotic Minds" Family
Connect with Us:

Subscribe to Our Community:

Be a Part of the Conversation:

  • Your voice matters! Join the conversation on our social media channels, share your journey, and find support in our community.

Start Your Journey Today:

Melissa Franklin:

Hey everybody and welcome to the very first episode of our Balanced Growth Leadership Series. I'm thrilled to kick off this year-long journey with a topic that matters to every leader out there leadership for longevity. Today, we're going to be going beyond the surface to explore what it really takes to lead for the long haul. We're going to talk about how to stay resilient, energized and impactful in this fast-paced world. I'm joined by an incredible panel Lee Agbohlah, a transformation coach, who knows firsthand how mindset, health and fitness fuel sustainable leadership. Carlos De Leon, a business consultant who helps leaders build processes that don't just support growth but make it last. And Maira Carrier, a public health expert and founder of Maya's Love, who's expanded her nonprofit's mission to multiple cities while staying true to her core values. Together, we're going to break down practical strategies, share real stories and give you tools you can start using today to keep leading without losing yourself or your purpose. Let's dive in.

Melissa Franklin:

Welcome to Structuring Chaotic Minds, the podcast where we turn the chaos of everyday challenges into structured success. I'm your host, Melissa. In each episode, we'll explore innovative strategies, real-life stories and actionable insights to help you navigate the complexities of leadership, business and personal growth, whether you're an entrepreneur, a leader or someone striving for personal development. This podcast will give you the tools to create clarity in the chaos. Let's dive in. You've all made it work in your own way as far as scaling whether that was business, health or your community impacts. What's the one thing that kept you steady and true in your path, especially as things got tough?

Carlos DeLeon:

For me, it's keeping my why, keeping my why in front of me. That is key. In easier terms, remember who you're doing it for, who inspires you. I have this little exercise that I use, where it's called leaders that inspire you, and the activity entails that you select three people, or three celebrities, or just three three people that inspire you, and why. Um, and one of them in my list is my grandfather. I always aspired to be like him. I want to be a good person. He taught me kindness and empathy and not be afraid to try anything and treat people with respect. So I always remember that. So, when things get tough, I always remember what and always ask myself what would he do? And that just helps me keep moving forward.

Maria Carrier:

For me it's similar, like Carlos said, your why and it's really understanding why it is that I'm doing what I'm doing, whether it be in the community or in the nonprofit or in the public health world, understanding why I started that in the first place. If we're out in the community and it's giving something back to the community, understanding what it was that made me understand that there was a need for that, whether it be socks, I never forgot growing up that we needed socks growing up. So that was a big thing for me. And now when I go into the communities that may need a little extra for me, and now when I go into the communities that may need a little extra assistance, I make sure to bring socks for the kiddos. So remembering those things that affected me as a child and really incorporating it into the mission wherever I am has really kept me steady in what we do with Maya's Love.

Lee Agbohlah:

I think, similar to what everyone said. Of course the why is the thing that helps you out, but I also like to remember it's a journey. I think understanding that on your path you're not going to have things always go the way you want it to go, but when you understand that you will have ups and downs. But to stay steady on your journey is just to really kind of appreciate it and embrace it, because sometimes it's easy to always focus on the ups you know the wins that you get but to also embrace the challenges that you face, because that's also going to make you better. So sometimes it's just realizing that, that you're going through those different things because you're trying to be better and trying to be greater. So the why definitely helps, but I also think just always appreciating the journey and understand that it's a reason why you're on that path.

Melissa Franklin:

I love that. Thinking about that, I mean you in particular you moved from coaching in a gym to reaching people online so you could actually scale your work. You did this pre-COVID. What actually pushed you to make that leap and what's something that you would tell others who want to go big without losing themselves in the process?

Lee Agbohlah:

I think for me it was kind of easy just to understand that I know I could do more than what I was doing. So the big thing that gets me to want to do more is knowing like I have the potential to to really do more. So, like, personal training is great. I think everyone can learn from it. It because you learn hands on from it. But just through my experience of working with people I knew there was more that I could give and to really help people. Because I felt like personal training was limited in the aspect that it only really focused on the training part of it and I felt my greatest strength as a coach is a lot more than that and I really felt that I could bring more of what I needed into what the clients needed as well. So it was to me like a win-win for both sides, Like I could be better, they could be better in what they needed. So that was what really pushed me toward that.

Lee Agbohlah:

I don't think I really thought about it as a downside. I only thought about the size. That was going to help me more. And especially when you are working for a corporate system, I think everyone can understand there's going to be limitations to the different things that you're trying to do. So when you kind of go on your own path, it's really you. You know you're able to put your unique touch on what you want to have happen. So I think many will feel that way where they kind of get to that and wanting to do more, to do more. So the way to do that is really breaking through and putting your uniqueness into it and helping others within what you want to do. You know, in this world I feel like that's the big thing.

Melissa Franklin:

I think, Carlos and I talk about that a lot when we talk about our clients with business coaching and such. So, Carlos, thinking about you in particular, especially the business owners that you help build their systems and hold up under pressure and growth. What's the simplest system or routine? Every leader should be able to lock down and keep their work sustainable in those long hauls.

Carlos DeLeon:

It is. Set priorities and use checklist. Don't overcomplicate things. So, once you set priorities, what I mean by that is make sure you don't sacrifice people, make sure you don't sacrifice yourself. So the work, especially when you're starting out, we think that we're invincible and we want to work 24-7. But it's not sustainable. You will burn out for sure, especially if you start neglecting those around you, those that care for you. So set priorities, set boundaries, set schedules. That's number one. And number two is don't underestimate the power of a good checklist. And number two is don't underestimate the power of a good checklist. You don't have to get creative and and write an sop and over complicate things. Write simple checklist to do stuff, to do tasks, and stay on point. That's my advice I love that.

Melissa Franklin:

I think that, um, it was sweet to like what Maira and I have talked about as far as prioritizing and picking and choosing and having to put on all those different mom hats and such. Maira, you've taken Maya's Love from one city to multiple cities now and you've been staying true to your mission while expanding. How do you keep that consistency and purpose alive as y'all are growing and what advice would you give to others that want to expand their reach without losing that? Why that we've been talking about.

Maria Carrier:

I would say that one of the biggest things is knowing your mission, but also knowing that it's going to evolve with you as you grow as well.

Maria Carrier:

So it's okay to evolve and it's okay to stay true to that core of what it was, but know that it will evolve with time and depending on where you're at at which location. We have different chapters throughout South Texas and each one of them has its own culture and its own way of being, but the one thing that stays consistent is the people around me and the amazing team that I have. We have I have my president of my nonprofit organization and she has been my friend since Head Start. I left to the military for 10 years and came back and that connection was still there because throughout everything, we nurtured that relationship and really understood each other, not only as growing up, but also as the adults that we became and how we want to really put our love into the mission that we do. So I would say really knowing your mission, knowing that it evolves with you and with what's going on in the communities, and also really nurturing those relationships that are there, whether it be with your personal team or with the community as well.

Melissa Franklin:

Yeah, it's always important checking into, like I say, whether it be with the team or the community. But you kind of just got to check in with the team sometimes and just see how they're doing as well. Thinking of that, we can all get a little bit drained. So I want to kind of look at the audience right now. What's one thing that's draining your energy or making you question your own leadership? Is it keeping balance, finding support, dealing with stress, or is it something else? Y'all can go ahead and type it in the chat. That way the speakers can go ahead and try to give some advice for that. Or if anybody would like to come off mute and just say something that's been bothering them, that's free to do as well, if you don't want to type it in the chat mine would be definitely a struggle that I have is focusing on what I can control, especially right now.

Maria Carrier:

The world is very crazy. We work with families who have been through emotional trauma or just trauma in general, so really understanding that we have control over what we do have control over and we could be there and provide that assistance for them. But we know that the world is still chaotic. So that's my struggle right now to be able to really accept what I can't control, because I wish I could do more but if I just focus on that I'll be burned out right away. So, really focusing on what I can control and be available for the spaces that I can be in Thanks for reminding me what I need to do.

Melissa Franklin:

Anybody else, grace, saying juggling multiple tasks and jobs? Melissa says she knows for a fact that Carlos called me out on the checklists. I always keep forgetting to write stuff down and when I do write them down I lose the card. Yeah, I think, um, I have a pile of checklists and then they just get bigger and bigger and then I say I'm gonna do them and then I color code them and it goes from black to blue to red to like. You should already be doing this by now. But building those systems and actually just making that simple thing of just let me check it off, let me just remind myself and just get it done, you're not wrong, it can do some wonders. Thinking of that and what the audience is sharing for any of the speakers what's one thing that you guys do to stay grounded and focused and what's a quick tip that you could share with the audience?

Carlos DeLeon:

for me is make quick decisions. Don't overthink everything, because that's what happens. That's why you create so many lists. So now the checklist becomes another checklist, right. So make quick decisions. And if you're finding yourself having a hard time doing that, I would challenge you to go back and kind of look in the mirror and try to find that trigger. Why is it that you're not able to make a quick decision? I used to use this phrase quite a bit when I was in the corporate world and all my employees they were always afraid to try something. I would say just push the button, see what happens. And once you push that button, you realize that nothing really happens. And nine out of ten times everything is great, everything works out fantastic. And you're like man, why didn't push that button before, right or sooner? In the one time that it doesn't work? You just learn from it. The world doesn't end, nothing happens, nobody dies, uh it. You just learn something new. You know what.

Maria Carrier:

I should have done it this way, but stop overthinking it, just get it done I am an overthinker, so I will say I do the opposite of what Carlos said. I really I don't know those, because we were in the military and maybe that's why we weren't like we couldn't be impulsive and you couldn't just make that decision. It had to be like hey, there's so many people depending on you that if you make this decision like this, so we can't do that, so somebody will pass right, so then? So then I had to really learn on my civilian end how to take my time to make these decisions, not be impulsive about it.

Maria Carrier:

For me, one big thing that I do is meditate, and I meditate every morning, or I try to. I am also a mom and I have a job and I have my nonprofit. So, giving myself an hour in the morning where it's completely silent. I wake up at four in the morning and from four to five I'm just dedicating time to myself, I'm meditating, I sit and I listen to my music, I ground myself and then I allow myself to feel everything that's happening, find that trigger and be like this is why I haven't made this decision, or this is why I need to take more time to make that decision. So I give myself that hour in the morning and then I meditate, and that's how I'm able to stay grounded with everything that I do.

Melissa Franklin:

I love that you point that part out because it piggybacks off of what Carlos is saying. But it comes down to it's a trigger that we have that stops us from making that quick. Like, let's be real, all of us know what the heck we're supposed to do. We go in through coaching and I can send out all these workbooks and all this beautiful stuff, but why does everybody sign up for coaching? Because we have to have the conversation. You fill out the checklist and like what do I need to do? We know the answer, we don't want to do it. We need to do. We know the answer, we don't want to do it. We need to dig deeper and find what's the trigger. Like, let's talk about that, let's unpack that and figure that part out. So that's really what the coaching part would come into, but sometimes just that quiet space to really evaluate it and coach yourself through it.

Melissa Franklin:

It can be some really good ones. I love that tip of the meditation part. Um, it kind of reminds me of Lee. You're big on mindset and health and that keeps you going, even on a packed schedule. You just get it done and working out is like hygiene for you or something that's just a normal thing for you. What do you do, though, to dodge burnout and keep the energy up when you're feeling stretched thin? What can other leaders start doing?

Lee Agbohlah:

right now to keep their heads in the game. I think the big thing is routine. If you develop the routine, it is going to make things easier. Like to me, if I'm out of sorts, that's when everything's going to be thrown off. But to me, when everything is flowing properly is because I'm doing what I'm supposed to do within my routine, like if I'm to tea with the routine. It works. So I think the big thing is developing that part to understand, like, what works for you.

Lee Agbohlah:

So example is when people are trying to make changes within working out, I always say you got to find a time that works best for you. So example is when people are trying to make changes within working out, I always say you got to find a time that works best for you. There isn't a one size fits all because some people is. I think the mornings does work better for a lot of people because we get so busy. But hey, some people might like to just get stuff that they they need to other do on their tasks and then maybe they can do it later and they want to knock it out last. So it's really finding, I think, the routine that works for you. So for me, the routine that works for me and when I'm cooking, like to me is the flow of like getting stuff done is that's what really helps.

Lee Agbohlah:

I think that part of it is a big thing and really setting it up to the fair yourself out because you got to be really in tune with yourself, because if you're somebody that you know that you're going to try to push stuff off, the best thing you could do is like put that stuff first. Like if you can knock that out first, everything else is going to get easier after that. Like you really want to get that part of it done. So I think the mindset part of it for me, because, like, I can always put it back to working out, because that is something I do. So I try to put in a sense of that, like you know, get knocking out the toughest part of it, understanding that that's when I really get the best part of it and that's really going to help me out. So I really just think about that within, like, the routine of different things and I understand if I'm out of whack it's because that's usually not to the routine and that's everything you know when it comes to the day.

Melissa Franklin:

Okay, something like what Carlos and I have talked about. I like how he's coached other business owners and takes them through baby steps and thinks of one little thing they can change, because he understands habits and routines and things. So, Carlos, thinking about that, I've seen you talk about how important it is to have those systems and keeping those leaders there, especially from burning out, because a lot of these things aren't what's the word Sustain, sustainable, long-term and such that they can burn out a lot sooner. How do you help leaders build the support systems that they need and what's something that people can do for themselves, especially if they're going at it alone?

Carlos DeLeon:

Yeah, so I can tell you about my own experience. I experienced this myself, so I've owned multiple businesses Not all of them successful and I kind of learned as I went right, learning the hard way on the first few. And this keeps repeating itself with just about every client that I help. You're too afraid to ask for help, and that's probably our biggest mistakes as entrepreneurs or business owners, or you know that we think that because we made this, this decision of doing this, and probably against many people saying no, don't do that. People that are too afraid, you have that in the back of your mind so you think that asking for help is something bad, something wrong.

Carlos DeLeon:

I would encourage you to don't be afraid to ask for help and look around you. You have a huge support system that you're not tapping into your immediate family, your friends, your colleagues, past mentors, teachers, many people around you. I guarantee you, if you open your eye, you do have a support system. You're just not asking. So keep that in mind and the sooner you learn to create and write down a process and start delegating, start delegating the stuff that you don't like doing. That is not your thing. It has to happen, it has to be done, but it's not your thing. Keep doing the stuff that you are really good at and that drives you, and you have this passion and that will keep you going, that will keep you from burning out. And so, really, the key here is asking for help, and you do have a lot of help around you, you're just not looking Hot one.

Melissa Franklin:

It's like it's already there, just ask. But I don't want to ask because then I have to put my pride aside to make that happen.

Carlos DeLeon:

I think that's what a lot of us, that's the most difficult part.

Melissa Franklin:

Yeah, because we have to say either when you assume that people think less of you because you had to ask, or you think less of yourself because you just don't feel qualified for that, because you had to ask, you know what?

Carlos DeLeon:

the funniest thing is? That when you do try it and I would say 99.9% of the times you are presently surprised. The people that you ask they're like man, I was waiting for this, I see you struggling, I see you suffering, I was ready, I didn't want to overstep. And they're like, kind of open up your eyes, man, I should right. They really care for me. So just think about that. People do care for you, so you'll be very surprised.

Melissa Franklin:

People run up, they want to help you I think might I and I have talked about that as moms asking for help, and, uh, I mean, you watch the dishes, thanks, but you didn't do them the way I wanted. So then there's that question too. It still comes to that Might nonprofits definitely come with their own unique pressures, then how do you stay motivated, though, when the resources are tight and things start feeling overwhelming? What advice would you give to leaders who are in that mission driven work so that they can keep that fire going?

Maria Carrier:

I would say, be consistent because, just like Lee said, being consistent and having that routine of knowing, okay, whether it be something small, from social media to the whole mission itself. Being consistent and saying, okay, every day we're going to get up and meditate. Every day we're going to get up and post. Every day we're going to get up and go for this walk. Being consistent in your mission and what you show to the community, too, and what you show to your community partners, to the people you service, is very, very important.

Maria Carrier:

And staying hungry and learning, because if there's a resource that's lacking or being a little bit, that we needed more, um, checking in with ourselves and saying like, is this something that I can go and learn in the community too? Is this something that my team can learn in the community? What is it that we could do to have those outreach options, to be able to get those funds? And then always keeping it within yourself and asking that check-in of am I doing this for the right reason? Am I doing this in support of my mission? Or am I doing this because of an alternate motive? Working in the non-profit, you get a lot of different opportunities and different people who want to have an input in it. But knowing what your mission is and and keeping that consistency is, I would say, is key.

Melissa Franklin:

I love that because it's keeping that mission driven. Just like every business owner knows by now, no one's gonna care about your business more than you. It's the same thing with the non-profit, like the mission, keeping it focused and keeping it there. It all kind of comes back to that remembering your why, really remembering your why, and staying focused on your path and like what you guys need. So, thinking about that, go ahead and bring us to our last question for all speakers then, and then, oh, that's not right. Right, I'm sorry about that. All right, so I'm gonna leave the question up, but feel free to come off and answer this. When you guys look at the work that you all are doing, what do you want people to take away from it? What is the real impact that you're aiming for? That'll stick even when you're not around. Like what legacy are you guys trying to leave behind?

Maria Carrier:

I can go.

Maria Carrier:

First, I would say.

Maria Carrier:

Before I forget, I would say that my main thing is I want every little kid that we come across, or every mom that's struggling, or every veteran that's going through, whatever it is, in whatever way that you see yourself in our mission, I want to make sure that they understand that you could do anything in the world, that there's options out there for you.

Maria Carrier:

I grew up in the projects and when I share my story and share what we, what I've been able to do afterwards and coming from an immigrant mother, kids really see that and say if she could do it, I could do it. Or if you know, if she was able to come from this place and get away and do things and come back and give to our own community, then I could do that too. So for me it's that impact of inspiration and knowing that you could do anything in the world and you're. You might be limited by your situation at that time, but at any time you have that power to keep telling yourself I can do this, I can do this. There's going to be a time where I can have full control of this situation and get out there and keep growing and know that you can make that difference.

Melissa Franklin:

You want to go ahead and go next? Sure.

Carlos DeLeon:

I was clapping for Maira.

Carlos DeLeon:

It was good it was good For me is the impact that I make on the business owner beyond the business.

Carlos DeLeon:

So part of the coaching that I do is that I always end up saying that what I do is 80% emotional and mental and 20% technical Because they hire me to help them grow their business or set systems or, you know, fix something that they think is broken. I dig deep into the lives of my clients to understand them as humans so that I can truly help them make a difference in their lives. So yes, at the end of the day, it's about numbers, to see how we can help the business. But when I get a reaction where they said you made me a better husband, you made me a better wife, you made me a better person just with the talks that we had, or what you showed me what I can do, or just to believe in myself, to me that's what it's all about and that's why I love doing what I'm doing. So, knowing that impact, knowing that I'm changing people's lives for the better, that's just the reason I do what I do. The fixing the business and making the business better is a bonus. I love that.

Melissa Franklin:

I think pretty much any coach who really does that goes into it. For that reason, what about you, Lee?

Lee Agbohlah:

I mean, I think everyone's pretty much head on it. You're not just doing it for yourself, obviously, you're doing it for the people that you're trying to help, so you want to be able to know that impact is felt by people seeing you know the changes and being able to do that. I think, especially for me, it's just just in the world we live in, there's a lot of messages out there that can get people going the wrong way. So I just wanted it to be that people understand. Like you know, I stood for something that I believed in and I didn't go away from that and I was able to keep that message true to it and it was able to make an impact on people. And to me I look at it not just you know, of course, people that I'm able to coach, but people that maybe never become you know a client or something like that, or. But they took something away from it because they saw you know a client or something like that, or. But they took something away from it because they saw you know what was out there and it helped them and they were able to make changes.

Lee Agbohlah:

And to me, I think of it as kind of a ripple effect, because a lot of times, it's not just the person that you directly impact. That person can impact other people as well. So I really look at that like not just impacting those people that see you, but also the people that that had effect on and impacted the other people around them as well. So I really believe in that as well to have that message spread, that people can take it and it helped others around them, and just being able to impact as many people as possible within that. So to me, if I can make it and it helped others around them, and just being able to impact as many people as possible within that, so to me, if I can make it better and people could gain something from it and that was beneficial to them and it really made an impact on them, I think that's something that's always special, that I would want that to be left that people can remember.

Melissa Franklin:

I love that. I think it resonates with me, for each of you, and why I asked each of you to come on is because, at the end of the day, I like lighting a fire inside of people and helping them grow. But it's that awareness that there's something that keeps us going. But we need to remind ourselves that there's a balance and that battery eventually runs out. So it's important to have people in your corner that will find that balance for you to push you to make decisions, get it done, keep going, but at the same time, focus and drive into one space and at the same time, have it be purposeful. It's important for me to continue in education, but I could only serve kids for so long before my body eventually burnt out. And burnout is something that's a word that a lot of people don't really listen to. There's one thing when we talk about I'm tired. There's one thing that talks about I'm exhausted. There's one thing completely different when it means you're burnt out, and being burnt out is when that nervous system starts shutting down. Our decision-making skills are out the window and we're really not in that place anymore. So I think this really comes down to finding the right balance in all of these things. So we don't get to that place, to where we can't make those great decisions anymore in an impactful, quick, quick way, and we start overthinking ourselves and creating the trauma or a resentment towards our decision-making because we moved too fast in the past but we weren't moving too fast rather than we had too much going on.

Melissa Franklin:

And Maira's right it comes down to there's a lot of people depending on me as a mom. There's a lot of people depending on me as a leader in schools or in organizations and the businesses that I help coach and the decisions they end up making. But if I don't really balance myself, then I don't show up the way that I'm supposed to and it can lead to another decision that's really going to lead to a lot more people being impacted negatively because I didn't show up in the right space. So I love that everybody's been sharing that. I'm going to go ahead and switch over then to our audience guys and let's ask them Is there any type of questions that you guys would want to ask then for our speakers? Is there any topics that are really sticking out to you based on today's topic, or questions and discussion?

Nynjeu Nmah:

hello, this is Nynjeu. Thanks, sorry, hi. How are you guys doing? Um, thanks for having the panel. Um, so I work with Melissa. Me and my boyfriend are doing a transportation company, so I guess my question for you guys is um, this is for me like my first venture into entrepreneurship. Um, not everyone that's an entrepreneur has always been an entrepreneur. So my question is how did you guys learn how to transition from the mindset of like a nine to five regular day job to entrepreneurship and taking ownership of your business?

Melissa Franklin:

That's a great question, but I want to let Maira take that one your business?

Maria Carrier:

that's a great question, but I want to let Maira take that one. For me it's a little bit different, um, because I also have a small business. But I've had to really um, I created that small business because I saw a need in what was going on at the same time. So I don't really invest a lot of my time in that business because it's only there to support my ass love. So for me it's a little bit different. But I would say I time box in everything I do.

Maria Carrier:

I don't know if that's a thing, but I time box. So when I'm spending the time in my nonprofit, I really spend the time there. When I'm doing, I call it mommying. When I'm mommying, I do that time there and I don't get distracted. And when I'm doing, I call it mommying. When I'm mommying, I do that time there and I don't get distracted. And when I'm at work, I also have a job too. So I just started working. It is a nine to five um, so it's been a little bit of a of a challenge to intertwine it all and make it work for me. So I don't know if, um, Carlos, I need the guidance too.

Melissa Franklin:

If you want to answer too, I don't want to piggyback before Carlos jumps in, because I love that, but kind of saying, Maira, that's the cool part, you actually created a business and that's kind of what a lot of business owners never get to do is create a business that they can successfully exit from and it's still running. That's kind of the point. Like you should be able to do that, and that's kind of where Nina wants to eventually get to to be able to be able to do that. But yeah, that nine to five part, I know for myself, kind of like what you're saying. It was more.

Melissa Franklin:

I'm not used to not working all the time. It was having the time box or time stamp in my calendar when I was going to be mom, when I was going to be business owner, when I was going to do those other things, because if not, then really taking a break for me really wasn't taking a break anymore. Now it was well, that's just replacing something else now on my schedule. And I was really guilty of that because I was so used to being busy to feel important or to feel useful and I had to undo that, like really undo that, to start giving myself permission to actually delegate things that I was like no, nobody else can do that, only I can do that. And Carlos and I have beautiful discussions about that and he reminds me, like no, you don't have to do it.

Melissa Franklin:

That's what I was saying, like I've kind of wanted to piggyback off of that as a mom, but like you're, you are doing it, you're, you're able to create a system that's worked for other people and that business is now still going, and I think that's the cool thing, because she's a physician and she's starting this job or this business venture, but she doesn't want to run the business venture rather than create it and then more in that process too. Carlos, I know I'm rambling, what do you think?

Carlos DeLeon:

um well, all great points from you guys, and it is a bit different for everyone depending on your personality and your history and what you're used to, but the way I can describe it, or the way I can help, is when you use the word entrepreneurship or entrepreneur, do entrepreneur equals leader. You got to tap into your leadership skills and that's the first thing. You have to be retraining your mind. Now you are the leader of this venture. Forget about the entrepreneurship part. The entrepreneurship part is what drove you to do this. It's the hunger. It's like I want to be something, I want to do something different. I want to try this on my own. That's the drive right Now.

Carlos DeLeon:

Actually doing it and creating something is out of your idea, out of your passion. Now you have to become that leader from day one, and that being a leader doesn't mean you have to have a team, even as a solopreneur. You have to become a leader and lead yourself to the right steps through the entire process, right? So, yes, it is hard, but, just like anything else, you just train your mind. So I have practical approaches. Is if you're used to a nine to five and you're now transitioned into an entrepreneurship, keep that nine to five for the first few weeks and then do nine to four, and then do nine to three instead of taking a lunch break. Don't take a lunch break. Kind of break the mold, break the system. That will reteach your mind. It's okay, nothing will happen and you will find that perfect schedule for your new job, for your new role as the leader of a company, as the leader of something you're building, and especially if you're building something with an exit in mind, right. And especially if you're building something with an exit in mind, right. You're building something so you can build this great thing, so it can run by itself, and then you step back and just enjoy the fruits from it, right? That's everybody's dream to have a business that runs without you.

Maria Carrier:

Yeah, right.

Carlos DeLeon:

Yeah, that's exactly.

Maria Carrier:

Yeah, right, yeah, that's exactly.

Carlos DeLeon:

And so that's really the advice I can give you. And it takes time. So don't be a little patient, but be intentional in your decisions. Find it, make sure you're doing it, make sure you're trying it. And probably the best advice I can give you Find it, make sure you're doing it, make sure you're trying it. And probably the best advice I can give you is enjoy it. Enjoy that part of the business, because maybe we're not making enough money. But, man, enjoy the time. Then right, you don't have to worry yourself to death. Enjoy the freedom, some of the freedoms, at every stage of the process. You should enjoy it, and it would be much easier to do that, to make that transition.

Maria Carrier:

And I love that that you said that, Carlos. I think it puts it in line for me too. So with my nonprofit, I started it almost four years ago and it was grind time when it started. At this point of my life, where I am, I'm able to step back and enjoy it because I have a wonderful team. So now when I go and do holiday car parades, I'm not out there as a volunteer, I'm out there as the founder of my own organization. So I enjoy the fruits of my labor. I get to hang out with the kids, I get to see Santa, I get everything because I'm there at that space, whereas my job I would just start it there too. So even though I am that leader, it's still in line with my personal mission of love of education, a love of helping community out. So I found a job that aligns to what my passion is too.

Melissa Franklin:

I was gonna say stop acting like it's a job job rather than.

Maria Carrier:

Yeah, I really enjoy it. I get to go out, be in community and everything, and it's like I'm having fun and it's not. It doesn't feel like a job, it feels like I'm developing myself with my team at Futuro to be able to get more tools in my toolbox and be able to be like okay, now that you mastered or not mastered. But now that you've been able to be like okay, now that you mastered or not master, but now that you've been able to enjoy the nonprofit sector, what else can you grow in and how can you support your nonprofit and other nonprofits in this learning experience that you're doing with this team? And that's through educational advocacy. So, even there, I have a manager there too, and being able to understand my leadership, but adjusting it in my own role is very, very important.

Maria Carrier:

I don't go into work saying, hey, I'm the founder and CEO of my nonprofit organization, you must listen to me. No, I'm there as a person that's learning and growing that part too. So I adjust my leaderships, the level of leadership, and really allow others to lead me too. There's a quote by General Patton that says lead me, follow me or get out of my way, and that's one of my favorite quotes in the world. But I love for strong leaders to be there and guide me and I love to be able to follow those leaders too. Strong leaders to be there and guide me and I love to be able to follow those those leaders too. And then when it's time for me to be that leadership, um full role, then I execute that as well. But understanding that, that balance too. So everything that I do, I love and it's in line with my personal mission and it doesn't feel like work, so I'll post all the time and I'm never I'm never stressed. It's so amazing.

Melissa Franklin:

Now, just just so you guys know she was. I think, to my understanding, you were volunteering at first with this stuff with Futuro, and she was just stepping in and she wanted to translate. So Futuro is a parent advocacy group here in San Antonio, Texas, that really helps bring awareness to parents about education, school choice, mental health awareness as well as just different opportunities for their kiddos and there's just so many amazing things that they get access to. But there's definitely a language barrier. So Maira was just there and translating and it was so wonderful to see these parents stepping up and advocating and then realizing, darn, they're speaking in Spanish. I bet you anything. They've never had the chance to hear this information like this before and be able to feel connected, to be able to talk and go through that. So all she was doing was volunteering and translating the whole time, and then it became a job. She was already there. That's the point. So that's kind of what it ends up getting to.

Melissa Franklin:

There's a grind, there's an initial setup, there's little operations, decisions and things that end up coming into that. But you pick and choose what you want your life to look like ultimately, and our goal is to get to there so we can give ourselves permission to step away from it. Mine's a blessing. A lot of people ask me why do you do what you do? Because I have the autonomy to be able to do that. I was blessed enough to be able to say you can quit your job. Okay, cool, Like you're crazy.

Melissa Franklin:

But luckily it was also in the space to where it didn't have as much debt as others would have, Didn't have as many barriers. If I ever want to just go get a job based on the amount of education I have, there's a barrier or limit on how much I'm still going to bring home every single month, and it's a very different situation for me than it would be for some other people. But it didn't happen overnight. It was decisions or little steps to get there. So a lot of this is steps. Any other questions or any other stuff that anybody want to piggyback off of that?

Lee Agbohlah:

I was just going to say similar to what everyone's saying. It is like a process. I think for me it was a little bit different because personal training is kind of business within a process. I think for me it was a little bit different because personal training was kind of business within a business, but the big thing I had to learn was, like, obviously, the other sides of it, like I was doing just parts of a business, it wasn't everything, so it did take some time.

Lee Agbohlah:

But I think the thing is to understand, like, like as long as you understand it's a process and you keep work on it, like even today, like I know I'm not anywhere close to where I'm also going to be but it's the transitioning of understanding, like you're going to work on it. So, depending on I think we all start at different spots when you are making that transition. So, depending where you are, as long as you're working on it, I mean mean it is a mindset thing. Mindset is the biggest thing. So you're going to have to work on certain things that are probably going to hold you back initially, but you're going to work through it by actually doing.

Lee Agbohlah:

I mean I think that's the theme of what we're saying is like you're going to have to take action and do different things and, as you do it, like you're going to be able to grow from it. So it is really the different I like to say reps. You're going to have to take reps, of course, within this, and that's going to help you out when transitioning and just understanding it, I think, just feeling like you understand that it's a process and you're going to get through it, as long as you keep to the core while you're doing it as well and that's going to help you out.

Maria Carrier:

I would say my situation was a little bit different. I came from a household where I didn't have any support and I had to join the military at 17. So for me it was my only way out and it was kind of like my saving grace, even though the military was a whole different experience and things happened Also, of course, like everything in life, for me it was my only way out. So, regardless of what it was, my teachers helped me and supported me and they told me you know, take it as a learning experience, supported me and they told me you know, take it as a learning experience when you go in each duty station and get to know these people, understand their culture, learn about them, learn about what duty station you're at, and see those leaders and take what you know as a good leader and what worked for you as a soldier or a service member, and then also take in mind and keep it in mind that you don't want to be the same leader that certain people showed you. Some people might not be the best in leadership, and that's okay, but you look at it, you take it and then you put it in your toolbox and say this is not the leader that I want to be. So for me it was a learning experience and in coming out of the military I spent 10 years in and when I got out it was a culture shock. So it was interesting to.

Maria Carrier:

I also got out in the military and lived in Hawaii, so it was like aloha time, so everything was like slow motion and peacefulness.

Maria Carrier:

So it went from me going super strict and doing everything by the second to relaxing, and that was the biggest thing for me.

Maria Carrier:

And then afterwards in the civilian world, really understanding where it is that I fit in, not only as a nonprofit owner or a business owner, but as a mom too. And really understanding my voice, knowing that, okay, I am a female, first generation Latina woman. How can I use this voice to empower even more people? Or how can I use this voice to go stand in front of city council and say, hey, I'm a veteran, what, what is it that I can do? So learning the power in every single role that you've done and really taking ownership and not letting the imposter syndrome get you, because when you come from certain situations, your little inner self is in there saying like oh, but this happened, am I qualified to do this? Am I able to do this? But know that you are, and stepping in every room with that confidence of well, I know this, I'm as prepared as I can be and I can get this done. So I would say I don't know if I answered it or I went in circles.

Melissa Franklin:

I'm sorry, but All right, guys, I'm gonna go ahead and share our last piece then, as we go ahead and wrap up the evening. Speakers, any one of you, if you could give one piece of advice to someone who wants to make a real difference, but keep going strong and not burn out, what would it be?

Maria Carrier:

Love what you do.

Carlos DeLeon:

I would say set priorities, set boundaries, create systems and enjoy the process.

Lee Agbohlah:

If you're doing what you love, it's not work, like Myra said, I think, stay true to you like you started it for a reason.

Melissa Franklin:

Believe in the message, and that's always going to keep you grounded for me it would literally just be like really there's going to be chaos. Make sure that you make those pockets of chaos to remind yourself that there's growth and that we can take them for opportunities. So we like to joke around and say that we help you focus on the chaos that makes you happiest. So really prioritize that stuff that you love the most, because it's all going to come with it. Life comes with its ups and downs. Pick and choose the stuff that's going to get. Pick yourself, as Alyssa would say. Pick the stuff that really is going to matter the most to you at the end of the day. Say true to your why and make sure you build the systems and procedures to get there.

Melissa Franklin:

Y'all, thank you so much for joining us tonight. I appreciate all of you. I'll be sending over show notes for this and ways to contact all of your speakers. If you have any questions, feel free to reach out to us. Until next time, we will actually be reaching out in one month and we'll be sending the new dates for our new speakers. Y'all, have a wonderful evening. We'll see you next time. Bye.